The excellent adventure continues and I’ve come to learn a lot of things about taking a cruise.  Firstly, don’t ever call it a boat.  The crew doesn’t like it, and given that they would be responsible to haul my sorry ass out of the water if I went overboard, no need to make them upset.  It’s called a ship. So ship it is.  I also learned that all cruise liners are not equal.  This is my first cruise so I’m basing this on what some of my fellow passengers have told to me.  It appears the magic number is around 900 passengers.  I’ve been told the really big cruise liners, the one’s which hold 3,500 people, are nice but given the amount of passengers on board it impacts service levels.  I’m told there are wait lines for everything.  From waiting to eat to going to the bathroom.  No such issues exist on the ship we’re on.  We’re on a Crystal Cruise Liner, and they have a reputation for not overcrowding and superlative service. I’ve come to learn that’s a fact. I’ll get to the service in a moment.

I also learned that many passengers are frequent cruisers.  Example, I met a man by the name of Barry last night in the cigar lounge. Yes, the ship has a cigar lounge…high backed leather chairs….mahogany wood…cognac…and a giant flat screen TV with Fox News on all the time. It’s paradise! I digress, Barry and I got to chatting, the usual small talk, what do you do for a livening, first time on a cruise etc?  This is Barry’s 10th cruise, and he’s already booked his cruise for next year, the Atlantic crossing.  Barry has time on his hands, he’s retired, as most of the passengers are.  I think the median age on board is 73.  It’s been a long time since anyone has referred to me as young man.  Barry did, and I like Barry.  He’s a big bear of man, a retired family law lawyer from Virginia.  His specialty was divorce.  He said to me in his Virginia accent, “young man, when I was practicing law my matto was…I’ll guarantee I’ll win your case or you’ll get your spouse back”.  Let me tell you, laughing so hard that you’re coughing up cognac through your nose is damn painful.

As for the service on board, it’s almost over the top.  After a couple of days on board I wanted to yell, “enough already…trust me…if I need something I’ll snap my fingers”.  Just kidding!  I would never snap my fingers…I’d whistle.  Truly the  service is exceptional, and it’s consistent throughout the ship.  I’ve spoken to crew members from Croatia, Poland, Check Republic, Australia, South Korea, US and Canada.  They’re all so happy and willing to please. Being an employer I asked many of them why they excelled at customer service.  Every one of them said the same thing, “the company is good to us, we’re good to the company, and we always put the passengers first”.  Truly inspiring when you consider that crew members are on contract anywhere between 4 to 6 months.  They work each and every day of their contract.  No time off, that comes at the end of the contract, usually two months off.  I can’t imagine working for six months straight, with no days off, away from family.  Many of the crew members indicated that it’s difficult being away from their kids for such a prolonged period of time but they do what’s necessary to provide for their families. 
Damn, if we could convince these people to become brokers and lenders we would all be golden. They’re committed…they have passion…and they’re willing to sacrifice.

The most important thing I learned about being on a cruise is…food.  It’s everywhere and it’s available 24/7.  Something happens to you when you’re on a cruise.  You’re on the ocean…you see an iceberg…and you say to yourself…”wow, that’s a big iceberg…I think I’ll have a hamburger”. 

Unlit next time

Cheers